Sunday, July 10, 2011 | 12:49 PM
its been too long since ive blogged.
All i can say is that im thankful that now i have a lot of schools to teach.
unfortunately the stress is gaining up on me because i still have to improve on my teachin methods.
especially for secondary schools. Other than that, the income is starting to increase Alhamdulillah.
As for love life...
i was happily attached to the most wonderful boyfriend..
mus abdin.
never been treated so well by a boyfriend before..
took care of me very well and of my well-being..
pampered me with love..
never have i been so manja towards a guy in my entire life..
but to him i opened up...
to him i started being more of myself...
the hidden kitten who was hiding her true self all this while..
but shit happened.
i screwed up.
i screwed up EVERYTHING.
and seriously. FML.
i dont know why i did what i did..
and i regret it terribly..
because deep down the only person i wana be with is him..
and now all is lost.
its like now im in a state of bloody depression.
i never thought i could ever relate the song
'someone like you' by adele to him.
never.
and now, he wont take me back because he's scared the same shit would repeat itself.
sigh.
seriously fml lah.
i wana change. i wana change myself and get rid of whatever bad points i have.
syakira. u need to grow up already.
sigh.
i hope you read this, though i highly DOUBT that you would.
know that i really love you so much. and it hurts that i wont be able to see you anymore..
hurts that i wont be able to receive those caring smses..
hurts that i wont be able to feel your hugs and kisses..
hurts that you probably will never talk to me again..
i hope that i will change.
i hope that as time passes, we will meet again and you will see a different me..
i hope that till then, you will still love me as you did before and all thats left is to catch up where we left off or just start over..
i hope you will take me back..
i hope my feelings will never change for you...
if we're meant to be, we will get back together..
but in any case that fate is not on our side..
note that i had the most wonderful time with you..
it was only with you that i realised what i missed out in love..
it was only with you i truly felt pampered with love..
i will always rmbr the littlest things..
and i will always keep it in here <3
"nevermind i'll find someone like you
i wish nothing but the best for you too
dont forget me, i beg
i remembered you said
sometimes it lasts in love,sometimes it hurts instead"
i truly madly deeply love you and i hope you'll forgive me
and take me back.
